Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Things are going better here this week...Todd's still walking funny, but feeling quite a bit better. Unfortunately, walking funny made him throw his back out on Saturday, so he had an extra dose of pain and misery to help him take his mind off the pain and misery that was already going on downstairs. It was truly sad. But he's doing much better now.
I have been in a vile mood for a couple of weeks--I was blaming it on hormones, but that time of the month has come and gone and I'm still vile, so I don't know what to blame it on now. Every so often, it comes crashing down on me that my life isn't at all what I want it to be, but I don't know how to make it what I want it to be--and I'm not even totally sure what exactly I do want it to be. Which makes for a vile mood.
I've been listening to Garrison Keillor read his book Pontoon on my mp3 player, and that has cheered me up a little bit, which is weird, since the book is pretty much all about death and having your life turn out not at all the way you thought it would. But he hits all those themes with a light touch, and I find myself chuckling out loud as I walk at the park or weed the flowerbeds. Oh yes, I discovered that listening to a book makes the weeding go MUCH faster. I weeded for three solid hours on Sunday and never gave it a thought. I am slow, as ever, to grasp the benefits of technology.
As of today, I've lost twelve pounds, which is a drop in the bucket but still encouraging. I'm very loosely following a diet plan in a book on controlling your blood sugar, and I'm not having nearly as many late-afternoon sugar crashes, which is excellent.
I'm working on the weight-loss in part because of the blood sugar thing, and also because I was approved for breast-reduction surgery in late July, and I'd like to get some weight off beforehand. Too bad I can't get them to carve off half my stomach while they're chopping things down to size, but the insurance company probably wouldn't go for that. So I've got to try and whittle it down by my own efforts. Darn.
I thought all the increased exercise would kick up my endorphins and improve my mood, but that hasn't happened yet. But if I can't feel good, I can at least try to look good. Oh, and be healthier, too, of course.
I'll try and perk myself up and come on back with something more interesting next time, promise.